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Thread: only in america

  1. #1

    Cool only in america


    >
    >
    > ONLY IN AMERICA
    > Only in America…can a pizza get to your house than an ambulance.
    > Only in America…are there handicap parking in front of a skating rink.
    > Only in America…do drug stores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store, while healthy people can buy their cigarettes at the front.
    > Only in America…do people order super size meals and then get a diet coke.
    > Only in America… do banks leave both doors unlock but chain their pens down to the counters.
    > Only in America… do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put out useless junk in the garage.
    > Only in America… do we use the answering machines to screen our calls and then have call waiting so we won’t miss a call from someone we didn’t want to talk to in the first place.
    > Only in America…do we buy hot dogs in packages of 10 and buns in packages of 8.
    > Only in America… do we use the word politics to describe the process so well: “poli in Latin meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures.
    > Only in America… do the have drive -up ATM machines in Braille.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > EVER WONDER?
    > Why the sun lightens our hair but darkens our skin?
    > Why women can’t put on mascara without their mouths closed?
    > Why you never see the headline Psychic wins the lottery?
    > Why abbreviated is such a long word?
    > Why do doctors call what they do “practice”?
    > Why is it that to stop windows you have to click start?
    > Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
    > Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
    > Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
    > Why isn’t there mouse flavored cat food?
    > When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
    > Why didn’t Noah swat those 2 mosquitoes?
    > Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
    > You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don’t they make the whole plane from that stuff?
    > Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains?
    > Why are they called apartments when they are stuck together?
    > If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
    > If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
    > If interstates are roads from state to state. Why does Hawaii have them ?
    > Why do people turn down the radio when looking for house numbers?
    >
    >
    ~I Battle the Angel of Death 40 hours a week. What do you do? ~Author Unknown~

  2. #2
    Super Moderator cougarnurse's Avatar
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    Re: only in america

    Some of these are real head scratchers. :33: Sounds like George Carlin at his best.

  3. #3
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    Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

  4. #4
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    Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

  5. #5
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    Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

  6. #6
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    Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

  7. #7
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    Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

  8. #8
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    Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

  9. #9
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    Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

  10. #10
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    Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

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