Why do nurses treat one another badly?

[ruby43]

I just read the article by Kathy Quan about being the new kid on the block...and it was very informative. It also touched on what I had recently been exposed to. I have been a nurse for 20 years, and decided to try something new. I had a stressful time acclamating and adjusting to the way I was being treated. I felt the negative energy the minute I stepped onto the unit. I can be a nurse no matter where I go, and I have also been doing agency on and off for many years as supplemental income to my full time job preferences. This new job was so stressful. I was treated as if I knew nothing, could do nothing right, and basically felt very uncomfortable. Needless to say, after being a nurse for so long; I know I can go anywhere. At my age I do not feel the need to put up with that. I love having the flexibility of choosing from a wide range of jobs. I think of it as their loss, not mine. Good article.

[SoldierNurse]

I just read the article by Kathy Quan about being the new kid on the block...and it was very informative. It also touched on what I had recently been exposed to. I have been a nurse for 20 years, and decided to try something new. I had a stressful time acclamating and adjusting to the way I was being treated. I felt the negative energy the minute I stepped onto the unit. I can be a nurse no matter where I go, and I have also been doing agency on and off for many years as supplemental income to my full time job preferences. This new job was so stressful. I was treated as if I knew nothing, could do nothing right, and basically felt very uncomfortable. Needless to say, after being a nurse for so long; I know I can go anywhere. At my age I do not feel the need to put up with that. I love having the flexibility of choosing from a wide range of jobs. I think of it as their loss, not mine. Good article.

Hello ruby43,

IMHO, part of the reason that "nurses eat there young" is d/t it is a predominantly female profession. Please, keep in mind my wife is a nurse, as well as I. My wife & I have discussed this very same topic. So, from her perspective, as well as mine, maybe it is the passive-aggressive nature of some [NOT ALL] women.

I know that in years past MD's [mostly male] were jerks, especially towards the female nurses and treated them like maids, rather than health care professionals.

I've noticed that some of the seasoned female nurses are very territorial and not very receptive to new nurses. I've also seen agency/traveler nurses treated poorly by the regular staff. I always thought that was stupid. Great to have agency/traveler nurses on the unit to help with the short staffing.

I have noticed in the Army Medical Dept. the dynamics between new nurse - seasoned nurse, male nurse - female nurse, and nurse - doc are completely different compared to civilian side. One of the positives to being an Army nurse.

Anyway, just my 2 cents

[Christof60]

Hello ruby43,

IMHO, part of the reason that "nurses eat there young" is d/t it is a predominantly female profession. Please, keep in mind my wife is a nurse, as well as I. My wife & I have discussed this very same topic. So, from her perspective, as well as mine, maybe it is the passive-aggressive nature of some [NOT ALL] women.

I know that in years past MD's [mostly male] were jerks, especially towards the female nurses and treated them like maids, rather than health care professionals.

I've noticed that some of the seasoned female nurses are very territorial and not very receptive to new nurses. I've also seen agency/traveler nurses treated poorly by the regular staff. I always thought that was stupid. Great to have agency/traveler nurses on the unit to help with the short staffing.

I have noticed in the Army Medical Dept. the dynamics between new nurse - seasoned nurse, male nurse - female nurse, and nurse - doc are completely different compared to civilian side. One of the positives to being an Army nurse.

Anyway, just my 2 cents

I couldnt agree with you more, and I believe the military is different simply due to the more professional standard soldiers are held to. Pettyness isnt tolerated too well in the military, although it isnt perfect. I have had some real a**wipe commanders in the military, but among the general "staff", you either worked together well, or heads were cracked.. "You dont have to like each other, but you sure as hell better work together"..

Also, as I think I stated in another post, even the jerkiest male boss will leave you alone if you do your job... Not so with females (generalizing of course). I have worked with some very smart, cool, and skilled female nurses, but the field seems filled with nurses who are, not being able to find a better word, asses that are miserable in every way.
I sometimes wonder if it is as simple as having no control in their life away from work (as in marriage), and work gives them the arena/opportunity to express control. At a family reunion I went to a few years ago, I was discussing the field with family. When it came to the controlling, mean nature, of some nurses I worked with, and why it was happening, my aunt (VERY domineering, "liberated" woman) made the statement that "well, men have treated women terrible for years, maybe it is just our turn". I answered her by saying that if women were mistreated in the past (which they were), they had even more reason NOT to act the same way as they complained of being treated.....
Good luck to you, and I hope that things go well in your career.

Christof

[SoldierNurse]

I couldnt agree with you more, and I believe the military is different simply due to the more professional standard soldiers are held to. Pettyness isnt tolerated too well in the military, although it isnt perfect. I have had some real a**wipe commanders in the military, but among the general "staff", you either worked together well, or heads were cracked.. "You dont have to like each other, but you sure as hell better work together"..

Also, as I think I stated in another post, even the jerkiest male boss will leave you alone if you do your job... Not so with females (generalizing of course). I have worked with some very smart, cool, and skilled female nurses, but the field seems filled with nurses who are, not being able to find a better word, asses that are miserable in every way.
I sometimes wonder if it is as simple as having no control in their life away from work (as in marriage), and work gives them the arena/opportunity to express control. At a family reunion I went to a few years ago, I was discussing the field with family. When it came to the controlling, mean nature, of some nurses I worked with, and why it was happening, my aunt (VERY domineering, "liberated" woman) made the statement that "well, men have treated women terrible for years, maybe it is just our turn". I answered her by saying that if women were mistreated in the past (which they were), they had even more reason NOT to act the same way as they complained of being treated.....
Good luck to you, and I hope that things go well in your career.

Christof

Christof, I like the way you think!

[ruby43]

Thanks for the input. I have decided that after 20 years as a nurse, that I am able to pick and choose more, the kind of environment I want to work in. I am not out for recognition, promotion or "status"; I simply want to be a nurse. I love taking care of people, hands on, bedside nursing...the way it was meant to be.
I am going back to school finally, since hospitals are increasingly more challenging and limiting what LPN's can do; hospital nursing is what I love, so I will finish my degree and see where it takes me. Right now I continue with an agency, and my schedule is flexible. I am able to pick and choose where I work. I used the experience at the last place as a learning tool. I also wrote a letter to the director and manager letting them know how I felt while employed there and trying to "earn my wings" as a new kid on the block. The manager did call back and leave me a message wanting to talk to me a little more, so at least I made an impact in a small way. Let's hope it helps those who come behind me. Take care all. Ruby 43.