When I became a CNA 2 years ago I thought being a man would be an advantage. We are definately in the minority--affirmative action and what-not. Boy was I wrong. I'm wondering if I'm overeacting here or if other men have shared my experiences.

My first problem is assignments. On my floor we have preset assignments, varying on how many CNAs actually show up that day. We have a weekly rotation through these assignments. If there are no male cares on my assignment most charge nurses tell me to just deal with it and trade them off on my own. This often means I give away a woman who only needs help putting her shoes on for a 400 lb total dependant hoyer lift transfer with C-diff. (this is a made up example--I rightly fear HIPAA) I have no choice, I can only take what the female aides will give me. If I complain -I- am the problem because I'm making the charge nurses job harder. AAAARRGGGHHH!

My second aggrivation is the double standard when it comes to "pet names" and such. Many female aids will sit on male residents laps, kiss them on the cheek and such things. This doesn't bother me as long as the resident is cognizent enough to know it's just flirting. After all it feels good to feel attractive I understand this. The supervisers don't care either. HOWEVER if I merely call someone sweetheart, or honey, I get called to the supervisers office and am warned that my behavior is inapropriate and will be officially reprimanded if it continues. To be clear we have several dementia/MR patients who are obsessed with me and I would never EVER do anything to encourage this behavior by using pet names with them.

My last problem are no male care patients themselves. There are three "categories" of them as I see it:

a) Cognizent woman who just don't want men taking care of them: I completely respect this. I can totally understand why a woman wouldn't want a man washing them and such.

b) Dementia patients with history of making inapropriate comments, touching or grabbing men: I don't care if I get groped or sexually harrassed by these people. They don't know whats going on anyway. It's a heck of a lot better then someone throwing feces at me reguardless. The home is basically worried that someone will hear these comments and assume sexual abuse is going on and report it, bringing some big state investigation. Now, if there is a documented history of them making coments like this any investigation should realize that this is merely a behavior of the resident and is not an issue. Least, thats the way it *should* be. Also, there are way more men that have these same behaviors towards women and they don't make them no female care. This double standard causes tension between myself and the female aids. Unlike myself these behaviors do bother them.

c) The POA/guardian doesn't want male care for the resident: This one aggrivates me most of all. This implies all male CNA's are potential rapists who can't be trusted. This is offensive to the highest degree. Now I could understand if it was an 18 year old comatose porn star or something. If male CNA's can't be trusted to control their perversions with one resident they can't be trusted with any and therefore should only give care to men.

Any other guys out there have these kind of problems? Please tell me I'm not alone.