New Grad and working in the ED

Oh one Sat morning at a walk in clinic I worked at we had a rent-a-doc on duty and myself... Charts were all done the door jam and onto the floor.. The waiting room was full..OF course every one had been sick all week but hadn't had time to visit there reg doc.. The secretary only put a brief despcrition of the malady on the chart..

I picked up the next chart and it said "foreigh body" I figured it was some guy with sawdust or metal in his eye.. Nope it was a pretty 30's something young woman. Who was getting married the next Sat.. She volunteered the info..

I guess her b/f soon to be hubby ( ok I can't spell fiance) was out of town.. She had been busy with a hi-lighter and the top had become lost..Last thing I wanted to do on a busy Sat.. A pelvic.. And the rent-a-doc was probably younger than both of us...All the other staff wanted to know what color the cap was .. I kept telling them all day "only the doc and I know"

Come to find out she was a frequent flyer....

WR,,, three commas for Becca

I often wonder if she is still married???

[1mg.epi]

I once worked two ER's. One night at job 1, man came in with vibrator up the old poop shoot. he said he never did this before. of course he had to go to surgery to have it removed. (ever listen to bowel sounds with one of those in there) Any ways, 2 wks later at my other job same man came with the same story that this has never happened before. after he gave me all the too much to know details, I reminded him I was his nurse at the other hospital. Never saw this man again. I bet he went out of state to be seen!!

This is an old post of mine but it fits at this time.

[jilly99]

OMG! ROFLOL! Probably a frequent flyer.

[jilly99]

just curious, how did you document those bowel sounds? :-)

[doubleA]

Working for a borderline double digit IQ community, i had a 39f brought in by ems for c/o pain. her husband was smart enough to follow her by pov, while she was transported. upon arival, she was screaming to give her medications to stop the burning! Hx, given by non hysterical husband: they were initiating sex, with the lights off and instead of reaching for the ky jelly he reached for the for the bengay and applied it over the vaginal area causing severe pain.
Of course douching was not considered by her part, she thought we had the magic syrup. We sent her to BR for her anual shower, taught her about the meaning of soap, and advised her that the curtains separating the cubicles are not sound proof, since she could not stop talking about her disgusting sexual habits.

[phil34]

I was in Psych before I went to ER and had one heck of a time moving over. They are very different kinds of nursing.
My first week at the County hospital I had my first trauma patient. He was ETOH and poor historian to say the least. He had a wound on his arm... smelled really bad and had a really crappy bandage job. Since I wanted to assess it, I pulled the dressing back and maggots were crawling all over the bandage and his wound.
After 5 year in a level one trauma center (busiest in America) you get everything. One of my peers who was removing a sock also removed what she wasnt expecting and screams.. so much for a poker face...
She pulled off two toes as an a souvenir.
FB in rectum everything from wood massager, toothbrush holder, Salt shaker (large with faceted sides) most are removed in endoscopy but not the smooth sided ones.
Level one designation for all those ER fans has all specialties available and go down from there. Didn't know what the heck trauma designations were until I worked in ER

[BADRN1992]

I've been in the ER over 7 yrs now, but I had a funny incident when I first started there. It was like my second day, and another nurses patient put his light on and said he had to have a BM. So I put him on the bedpan (he was a COPDer being seen for an exacerbation).

After a few minutes, his brother comes out and says very calmly "I think something is wrong with my brother." A couple of us go in and he was in full arrest!!

We coded him, to no avail - he stayed dead. For a few weeks after that, whenever anyone needed to use a bedpan, all I heard was "Don't send Babs, she'll kill your patient!" LOL

I wasn't funny at the time, but now I can see the humor in it.

[ITrvl]

I've been a Nurse for 30 years, (almost 20 in ER). My first 10 years were spent in OR. The funniest thing I remember happened in the Cysto Room. Our Urologist inserted his cystoscope into a female patient and peered through the scope. He sat straight up with a look of disbelief on his face, shook his head and looked back into the scope. Without hessitation he remarked, "In 30 years of practicing Urology this is the first time I have ever had a pair of eyes staring back at me!" Apparently, this woman was "pleasuring" herself with a small pet snake and lost it up her urethra! I don't think I have ever laughed so hard in all my life!!!!

[Raubeeo RN]

Had a guy come in to my ER with a Full sized Suave shampoo bottle stuck in his rectum. He said that he slipped in the shower. Go figure!

[nightstar3dp]

Ok Ok! I got one! I work in the Emergency Department and Medical-Surgical floor.

One night I was working the Med-Surg unit when ER calls us and asks for a bed because they had a local drunk who they simply could NOT get his ETOH level down after his 5th liter bolus of NS. This guy was nasty, according to the ER staff so they decided to give him a bath before admission. Well, about 10 minutes after they had admitted the patient the ER nurse that admitted him called me and informed me they had found the problem to this situation. The ER nurses decided it would be a good idea to take the bed he was lying on outside to spray it down with the water hoes since he and the bed had been SO nasty. Well as they where doing this they found a bottle of 100% proof Vodka underneath the bed railing that the nurses did not catch. He couldn't of brought it in when he came in because he arrived by EMS, but there was family that came to visit him so, we came to the conclusion that his family brought him the ETOH. But I found it funny that after every liter of bolus we where giving this guy, he'd drink another fifth. LoL!