[sobrrx4]

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Four years ago, I notified the State Board that I made a personal decision to enter an in-patient rehab to put an end to an out of character increase in my
use of ETOH. I was given the advice that I needed to make this notification from a confidential conversation I had with a new human resources person at
the hospital where I was employed. I was not an impaired nurse, just a
woman who made a conscious decision to put an abrupt end to a short lived
use of ETOH as a poor solution to coping during a particularly stressful period of my life. I left rehab sober but humilated by the experience. My ego was shattered, my self confidence was destroyed. I was foggy from the drugs they prescribed for anxiety but determined to stay the course and put my
life back in order. My experience with a so called "counselor" from the State
Board was so impersonal and harsh. She didn't care one bit about my story or the fact the no one at the hospital where I worked (except for the inexperienced human resources person) was aware of my personal attempt at
self improvement. She was cold and stoic in her directives of what I had to do to preserve my liscense. Since I already was continuing in an outpatient program that was intense and time consuming, the list of obligations and additional meetings, the restrictions in my practice, and the foreseeable
humiliation I would have to endure led me to walk away from my job and nursing. The punishment seemed too disproportionate to the crime.
Being a stay at home mom has been so great. I have maintained my sobriety,
done alot of volunteering for activities my children are involved in, and continue weekly therapy for my own self growth. I do however, miss being the nurse I was and would seriously love to return to my career. I know now I am better than ever and so ready to take whatever steps are necessary to make this possible. I would be so greatful for any advice or feedback from all nurses.

[welshy905]

Hi!
I am in the Pa VRP. I read your story and just have some advice that I hope will be benificial. First of all, you said you confidently told someone in HR about your problem with alchohol. You have to understand that as forthright as that was for you to do, the person you told has an obligation to protect the patients in the hospital. When a substance abuse problem of any type is disclosed, the hospital is obligated to report it to the state. You can then be enrolled in the voluntary recovery program. (VRP) Because we can't work impaired, we have to aggree to be monitored by the state. This allows us to practice with restrictions. The person you refered to as a counselor from the state is anything but that. They are a "case manager" and are there for the protection of the people of Pa. Kind of like a parol officer. It is up to us as individuals to seek treatment for our problem. When we take care of ourselves, everything else will fall into place.
I understand how you feel about the whole humiliation with rehab. I didn't care for it myself but I also knew I was manipulating and lying to people I love. I needed to let myself be led into the whole recovery thing.
Don't take the whole state monitoring thing personally. We are addicts and we're not always the most honest people. Try to meet up with some nurse groups. I found it to be a great support system. I don't know what part of Pa you're from, but there are some great groups in the philadelphia area.
Keep your chin up!

[sobrrx4]

Dear Welshy905,
I so appreciate your words of encouragement! As a nurse in the PA VRP, the insight you have is my missing link to an otherwise solid comittment to
sobriety and re establishing my status as a practicing nurse. I feel very ready to contact the Board and follow the necessary protocol in order to begin this process. I do have several questions for you if you wouldn't mind.
Since it has been 4 years since I last worked, what will the board require of me in terms of education? Will I have to retake the state boards? Also, although I have been under the care of my family doctor for the past four years, I have not had urine monitored regularly (no insurance). Problem? Post inpatient rehab I continued with the program out-patient until completion
(6months), attended many AA meeting and retained a recovery therapist whom I continue to see weekly. My concern is that I no longer attend AA meetings on a regular basis. Working one on one in therapy has had the most dramatic and beneficial impact. Do you see this as an issue? And lastly,
I do live in the Phila. area and would be very interested in learning more about the nursing groups you mentioned.
I look foreward to hearing from you.

[welshy905]

There is a great meeting in center city on Friday nights at Pennsylvainia Hospital. It's actually in the "Hall-Mercer" building at 800 Spruce St. Also, another favorite nurse group is in Willow Grove on Weds nights @ 7:30 at the Barnes and Noble store near the Willow Grove Mall. I know that sounds weird but it was started by a few nurses that went through rehab together and it is actually a great place to get info and support on the VRP.
In my experience with these groups I remember meeting a woman who had just moved from Florida and was just getting into the Pa VRP. She had given up her Florida liscence for six years, so I don't think they will make you retake the boards.
I don't have muchb time riught now but I'll be in touch. Take care. Pam

[gratefulfan215]

hi im in the pa vrp too. maybe we can stay in touch