[southeastnurs]

I am a nursing student about to begin clinicals in the hospital. For an assignment, we needed to find out from nurses whether they feel it is appropriate to "cross the line" with their patients- meaning becoming too involved or too close with them. As a nurse, how do you feel about getting close with your patients, or too close, for that matter?

[cassioo]

does that mean having empathy &/or sympathy for their situation such as loss or does that mean getting the phone number to call the patient at home because they are hot? As I said in another post in the small town I work everybody knows somebody and everybody else's business. I see nothing wrong with going to the funeral home if a patient dies especially if they've been in your unit for a long time, a repeat patient over years, home health/hospice patient that you've been in their home daily or several times a week for years....many variations on that question. The calling is a no no though.

[nursinghumor]

Any chance we can move this discussion to the other two already in progress on the same topic?

http://www.ultimatenurse.com/ubbthre.../Number/12691/

http://www.ultimatenurse.com/ubbthre.../Number/12693/

Andrew Lopez, RN
http://www.nursinga2z.com

[Shelly Levitt]

Nurses need to maintain a professional relationship with all whom they interact with while on the job. An emotinally healthy nurse needs to get their need for socialization, love and belonging, sex etc. outside employment. Since you cannot be sure of anyones qualifications on this forum it might be wise if you interviewed actual nurses that work for the hospital or agencies where you recieve your training. GOOD LUCK!!

[faviola]

I do think there is anything wrong with getting close with patients..just know what you are gettin yourself into..it's not always for the best. but it can be a great way to provide great care for a patient and show them that you truly care.

[maggiedanurse]

getting close with your patients is completely unprofessional. you have crossed the line in doing so.

[jmecisco]

I can relate though I'm not a nurse.........


My wife is a nurse and has formed a friendship with a young man early 20's patient of hers. He's not in great health and I'm sure she cares for him in a maternal way and just wishes he gets better. My question is where do you draw the line? It's obvious they are friends at the clinic she works in. You can tell they are on friendly terms. I'm afraid boundaries may be tested though.

Recently I found out they communicated outside of work for several days by txt and cell when he was in the hospital (unafilliated with my wife's work) for a 3 day stay. My wife was so concerned that she called the hospital relentlessly until they were able to at least touch bases. After the initial contact, they texted and called each other fairly regularly until he was released from the hospital (2-3x a day). He even asked my wife to pick him up from the hospital after discharge. She declined. Keep in mind this is not romantic. I am sure.

I wish him nothing but the best but I feel that they should not be that comfy being buddies when she's off duty. I can honestly say I think there's a sort of obsession with his situation and it's confusing me . When she gets home, conversation turns to this patient of hers non-stop. Isn't there a sort of code of conduct between nurses and patients that shouldn't be crossed? I know this isn't romantic but it still confuses me. any thoughts because I'm confused? btw, he's married and my greatest argument is his wife and family should serve as his support once he leaves my wife's clinic each week. I believe his wife may have questioned this behavior on at least one occasion so I feel semi-justified in my feelings. My wife is the greatest wife/mom to our kids. My issues are what are the boundaries between nurse/patient? The second issue is that I feel our family could be getting "cheated" out of family time. I just can't come to terms with this obsession as I call it.

I understand the original post and appreciate any feedback also.

[NavyJim58]

jmecisco, you asked for feedback so here's my two cents for whatever its worth:

You have something to worry about. Better have a serious talk with your wife.

[LTC LPN 2006]

I think there is a time and a place where it is appropriate to truely care about your patients. I work in long term care and it is hard not to become attached to someone you've taken care of for months or even years. For some residents who don't get visitors too often, they probably really appreciate feeling cared for and loved by staff members.
I feel it becomes inappropriate when your care interferes with your ability to make sound nursing decisions and care for your other patients. We recently had a CNA who was so upset by a resident's death that she could not stop crying and could not perform her job and actually went home because of it. Shedding a tear or two is one thing, but you cannot let it get in the way of your responsibilities. I think attending a funeral for someone in a nursing home where you've become close to them and their family shows you care and do not consider this over stepping the boundaries. Any other contact out of work other than a funeral I think would be inappropriate. But thats just my opinion.

[AmandaWIRN]

I think it is inappropriate to engage in any type of romantic or friendship-type relationship with patients. A nurse should not be calling, texting, or "hanging out" with his or her patients. The only situation I have ever been in where my work life crossed over into my personal life was when I was a pediatric chemotherapy nurse. I attended a few of my patient's funerals. After caring for these children, as well as their families for months, I needed to not only pay my respects, but to have closure.