Top Ten Worst Prognostic Signs For An Emergency Department Patient

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1. The Emergency Doctor tells you the patient is "well known" to your unit.

2. The patient:

a. Is a nurse
b. Was a nurse
c. Is related to a nurse

3. The patient has a suitcase packed.

4. The patient is off having a cigarette when you arrive.

5. The patient's referral letter:

a. Is written on a prescription form
b. Contains the words "I'm sorry."

6. The patient wont talk to you because:

a. They're unconscious
b. They've decided they "don't like you."

7. The patient has a charcoal grin.

8. The patient's ECG trace is so bad even the machine won't attempt to analyse it.

9. The patient has track marks over their radial artery.

10. The patient's medications fill:

a. A shopping bag
b. A second suitcase

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Andrew Lopez, RN
http://www.jocularity.com