The new ACLS.....

[cougarnurse]

Subject: You heard of new math, this is new med!
(Advanced Cash Liability Survey)

A.

1) Attorney
2) Airway

B.
1) Bank Account
2) Billing
3) Breathing
C.

1) Cash on Hand
2) Checking Account
3) Credit Cards
4) Court Date
5) Circulation

If an unconscious patient is encountered, follow the sequence below:

1) Shake patient and ask:
"Annie, Annie, are you insured?"

2) If no response, position patient to open pockets.
(Listen for loose change while positioning patient)

3) Extend neck. Open mouth and look for gold fillings.
( If time allows, check airway.)

4) Palpate neck for gold chains and necklaces.
Note: Carotid pulse may be an incidental finding.

5) Palpate pocket for wallet.
(Tell bystanders you are checking for femoral pulse.)

6) If uninsured, call for help immediately.

7) Traditional CPR is optional at this point.

8) If no response to CPR, proceed to ACLS

[Mom-n-More]

:lmao:

[SoldierNurse]

:houra:

[MRS. ERNURSE]

That was pretty funny!

[Grbrico_RN]

tears are rolling down my face... OMG.. that's hillarous!